Since the planning of My Big Day is on Hold... So im just gonna update infos for readers out there..
Nowadays mix marriages are becoming very common(Dulu quite difficult coz mindset parents klu anak masuk Islam and kawin dgn Melayu, they will forget their parents which is NOT true). I Have a Chinese BFF who is going to marry a Malay (Bless!) After doing a bit of research here and there and asking around the mix marriage couple…I came up with this post especially for Her and other B2B out there.
When u mix 2 different cultures, what important is..u need to know how to maintain a balance between both and learn to keep both side happy. Ofcoz cultures between both are not the same. So here are a lil’ tips for you out there.
What to wear
Ok..For akad nikah, the bride should be in more conservative attire (baju kurung or kebaya) whereas the groom wears the baju Melayu pasal Nikah ni, adalah Majlis Agama. As all Muslim know, Nikah yang Menghalalkan hubungan, bukan pertunangan atau persandingan. Nikah ni, Hak Allah. Tanpa Nikah, Tiadalah perkahwinan, tiadalah perhubungan, tiadalah ikatan. For the tea ceremony, Boleh pakai Cheongsam or the Chinese Attire..ikut adat Cina lah. As for the reception, u can choose anything from Songket to Chiffon to Lace… From Kurung Modern to Kebaya Pendek to Kebaya Labuh to Jubah to Lehenga ala Bollywood(if Malay kawin India or Pakistan lah hehehe)..anything depends on ur Theme.
Food For Receptions
As for FOOD…makanan mostly nya sama kan..in Brunei, and also Malaysia… The Chinese loves the Malay cuisine…and ofcoz..we Love Halal Dim Sums too hehehe So..u can have a mix of this and that. BUT STRICTLY No PORKS and NO ALCOHOL. Tho’ you are going to marry a Non-Muslim, and His/Her family are still not Muslim YET, that does not mean you Have to serve them with alcohols. U don’t get Pahala by doing so. Besides, even if u’re not a Decent Muslim, Respect your parents and Family and your Religion too.
My BFF always ask which one to do 1st, the Chinese ceremony or the Malay side 1st. Well, in my honest opinion, It’s never easy to do it in 1 whole week even if you wanna combine it. Coz it will definitely be tiring. You don’t wanna look exhausted on you 1st nite do you? So think it this way..Ceremony + Adat 1st… Enjoy later… Coz kawin ani sekali sja… and after that u’ll get to spend time for the rest of your life. UNLESS, u hardly spend time with each other for holidays etc, so the eagerness of spending time with each other is More hehehe
So if Malay+Chinese mix marriage wedding..paling penting Halal kan hubungan dulu. Which is, Nikah. Coz as I said, inda Nikah inda lah Halal. So, After nikah, you could do the Tea Ceremony. After tea Ceremony then u can do the Receptions. Kalau inda mau ngalih… 1 Receptions sja for both family. Kalau doesn’t matter ngalih kah nda and byk budget utk baju and place and etc… buat Malay receptions dulu pastu baru Chinese Receptions. Yeah like that lah… Or boleh jua Chinese Receptions dulu then Malay. If it’s my wedding… I would go for Nikah Pagi Jumaat then Petang nya Tea Ceremony. Lepas tu Saturday Chinese Receptions then the following week Malay receptions… Lepas tu..Honeeeyyyyy Moooooonnnnniinnnnggggg hehe Well..i don’t mind having… Honeymoon ku lama, coz I don’t travel on Holidays with my BF..it’s a NO NO…coz I think, if u don’t travel together before kawin…lepas kawin, the excitement would be even better. I don’t mind travelling plg with Him..tapi mesti ada my Mom ikut. But then I don’t think he want it that way…so it’s a NO to travelling together. Pasal.. I want to jaga MY NAME and my FAMILY’s Name =)
Anyways… That’s For now…